This process can be really hard.
You don’t have to carry that weight by yourself. There are people and organizations who want to support you and others who have walked this path before you. Below are just a few.
Fosters who requested their file, offer the following words of advice.
Mary Carter
Have support. Have someone with you that you trust and feel comfortable to confide in and share your story with. Social workers can be subjective. It is their opinion and bias doesn’t mean it’s your story. Be compassionate to yourself and read in parts. Expect that unexpected. Do something nice for yourself after.
Michael Davis-Thomas’
Prepare yourself.
Emily Stochel
I would say it will likely be hard, and they may learn things that may be hurtful, but that ultimately, it may also validate some of the feelings they have and/or decisions they have made. I would encourage young people to have a support network and utilize it during this process. A lot may come up for the young person.
Shaden Jedlicka
Prepare for too much information or nothing at all. I spent 12 years in Arkansas’ foster care system. I entered care at 9 years old. I left care at age 21, I requested my file at age 18. There were only 4 documents in my file. Nothing that I didn’t already know and nothing that could help me piece together my memories.
Saira-Jayne Jones
To not set your heart on finding anything out and if you do it’s a bonus. to make sure you have support and access to some kind of therapy or a strong friendship network.
Deborah Denzel
I would say if you really want it don’t stop until you retrieve it. I didn’t want it bad enough so I gave up but I know if I didn’t give up, I would have it right now.
Laura Bye
Maybe don’t, it’s very difficult because you want to know your childhood experiences but professionals (I am one myself) write in a way that is so robotic, inhuman and talk about you like you are an object. I think they forgot you can one day read these.
Anonymous
I think the process is different for everyone, but I would say don’t get your hopes up that you will get what you need or want. Go in with little expectations.
Adam Starks
Surround yourself with a team of adults that know you. That can be there for the hard stuff, the surprises and good things without passing judgement. Be prepared to have your memories challenged. As I was writing my autobiography, I couldn’t remember my 1st-3rd grade years due to overwhelming hunger and chronic illness. I didn’t know I missed over 140 days between Kindergarten and 3rd grade or some of the therapy sessions during my high school years.
Rebeccah Carlson
For anyone wanting to request their file, I would encourage them to be resilient and self-advocating. The legal system isn’t necessarily setup to fully support us in obtaining information about our pasts. There are so many roadblocks and barriers to accessing data that should be rightfully ours. Be patient, step back when you need to, and find individuals to support during the entire search process.
MN organizations
Power of Story
Get in‑person, hands‑on, or email help to navigate red tape and collect your records and, or DNA testing as desired with free Life History Scholarships.
Foster Advocates
Online Resource Guide created with fosters, led by fosters with information about education, housing, health care, emergency support, parenting resources, employment pathways, and more.
The Office of the Foster Youth Ombudsperson
They listen to complaints from fosters about their rights, safety, and experiences in Minnesota foster care, including Extended Foster Care and after aging out, and they step in when needed. They also make recommendations to agencies and write reports for the governor, legislature, and the public.
Children’s Law Center
Children’s Law Center of Minnesota gives free legal help to youth in foster care. They provide direct legal representation, train volunteers, and work on system changes so fosters have a strong voice in court and in life.
Foster Adopt MN Therapist Directory
A searchable therapist directory for Minnesota with providers who understand foster care and adoption. You can search by the insurance you have and the part of the state you live in.
